I just posted the video I'll Be Loving You (Forever) by the New Kids on the Block on my Facebook. This video stirs different emotions in me. The first one that comes to mind is puberty and the fact that I ever really enjoyed such vapid, commercial Top 40 music ever (even at 12) which makes me a little ashamed, yet nostalgic. Next comes the comforting feeling of security, surrounded by my family, which was safe and sound, although I never felt like I fit into (the town or the family but loved, all the same). Sadness for the NKOTB, for making it big but being commercially exploited (they weren't much older than me though...)

My first concert was New Kids in 1988 during the Hangin' Tough tour. I remember what I wore (forrest green riding pants with buttons at the ankles and a floral button down shirt from The Limited with Bass leather loafers, dark blue and brown) and being uncomfortable when the opener, Dino, brought a girl onstage, made her sit on a bar stool and hump-danced her while my BFF's mom sat next to us. I also remember the feeling of actually being in the same room with the New Kids and seeing Joey and thinking, "I cannot believe I'm in the same room with him!" I then remember looking behind me (in a huge ampitheater in OKC in the very top, second row from the last possible row to be sitting in) and seeing teenage girls waving a banner that said, "Marry me, Joey!" At that point, it all felt a little surreal, kind of disgusting, yet exhilirating; when they brought out the oversized fireman's ladder for the encore, Hangin Tough. I'm kind of disturbed by the whole scenario, yet comforted, kind of like when I was even younger riding in my family's boat listening to Journey and my mom said, "Now this is good music!" It seems endearing now, but at the time I can remember cringing visibly and thinking, "I am done with Journey." Was I born a music snob or did I pick it up somewhere along the way during childhood? I'm kind of ashamed, but it's still a part of who I am. Thank God I soon discovered The Beatles.

Nasal Bliss

So, I used my neti pot today. I used it as I was originally taught to do so -- alternating nostrils, 3 times each, body temperature water with dissolved sea salt. I am truly amazed at how clear my head feels, how much lighter it feels in general. A little bit of blood did come out of my nose and I'm hoping that's not a bad thing. I also did some sun salutations afterwards, which made parts of me stretch and crack like sally o'malley (molly shannon annoys the hell out of me). I wish I were more regular in my neti usage because it really does feel liberating to my brain to have released what seems like a pound of snot and other insignificant nose debris. I am going to try to make using this simple, yet miraculous, device something I do at least several times a week...

So I'm about to finish the 1000+ page book I've been reading, World Without End. Maybe one of the reasons I just decided to start a blog is to avoid finishing the last of this book that has been a totally comforting escape for me, especially the last two weeks. Times have been hard for me mentally and emotionally and being able to lose myself in a juicy novel has been extremely comforting. I've decided the next book I want to tackle needs to be even longer so I can put that feeling of loss off even longer. I picked up a copy of War and Peace several months ago; it's about 1500 pages and small print! Now, I'm sure War and Peace will definitely be more of a challenge than reading World Without End, but I'm too broke and don't have the motivation to go try to find something else. Besides, I read Anna Karenina (also by Tolstoy) last year, and it instantly became one of my favorites. War and Peace is a daunting title and also appears daunting by the thickness of the book, but I do know that I enjoy the way Tolstoy writes and I do enjoy a mental challenge (with books anyway). But, maybe I think I'm up for reading this book because my brain is on a snot-free neti pot high at this moment?